Thoughts

***This is not an assigned topic. Yay!!***

What do you think about right before you go to sleep?  I wonder about what other people think of before they began to drift off.  I’ve even thought about what other people think when they try to go to sleep while I’m trying to go to sleep!  Is it the same kind of things I think? 

I can’t even categorize all the things I think of; my mind just wanders.  I could be thinking of something happening currently in my life and then my mind brings up something that I haven’t thought of in years.  Sometimes the most clever, witty things pop into my head during this odd state where my body is past the expiration date, but my subconscious continues in full swing.

So, I have a notebook full of these random, possibly insightful and possibly witty--though I don’t really know since I’m half asleep--thoughts that I keep by my bed.  I’m positive no one else, but me would understand half the stuff written in this book.  I don’t even understand it sometimes.  I flip through it looking at past stuff and I’m like, What the heck did I mean by that?  I must admit I try my best to jot down quickly and in very few words the essence of what I was thinking at the moment so I can go back to sleep, but I don’t always think about being able to interpret it later.  I also have random pieces of paper that are all over my house--though I hope they’re somewhat organized into several piles in different places--with little notes that I’ve jotted down. 

Now, I’m going through them and thought I’d share:

I avoid using the phrase, “How are you?”  It usually comes up when I’m with someone I don’t know that well or someone I haven’t seen in a while.  When I hear it, I don’t know what to say.  Does anyone really want to know?  So often, people just use it as a greeting or to fill a silence and I can’t tell when someone really cares about my response.  It’s not even a conversation starter.   
“How are you?” 
“Good.” 
There’s some Facebook thing that’s something like, “The biggest lie is ‘I’m fine.’”  I don’t think so.  It’s just a polite way of saying, “I don’t want to tell you,” or even just, “I don’t want to talk about it,” because you know if you say one of those instead you’ll spark their curiosity even more so.


One of my biggest peeves is when a skinny girl calls herself fat.  Girls that are honestly insecure about their weight would most likely never say anything like that.  It annoys me when I think about what these skinny girls want, which is one or more of three things:
 1. They’re looking for a confidence boost.  They know they’re not fat, but are insecure about something else and know they’ll get a compliment.
 2. They’re conceited and just want the attention.
 3. They want guys to notice how fat they’re not.   
I think the last one is the main reason.  Why?  Because if a girl says something about her body, all eyes focus and concentrate on what she’s referring to even if everyone has seen her countless times and knows exactly what she looks like.


Note to self:  If you’re about to be kidnapped, act like a nut and scare the willies out of the kidnapper.  He probably doesn’t want to kidnap someone who’s mental.  (This is practically a word for word copy of a note I found.)  My version of acting crazy is to go bug-eyed and chant some crazy things like “I like to eat dead unicorns and stuffed hedgehogs,” and then laugh like a creepy witch as loud as I can. 


What would the world be like if we could see outside of the visible color spectrum?  I wonder if the colors we see now would drown in all the new colors.  Being an artist I think about things like that.


Why does candy corn sometimes have the white tip missing?  That’s my favorite part! Who would deprive me of it? **glares** Is there a white-tip-of-the-candy-corn thief?  x)


Is it weird that I like to dip my fries in my shake (no matter what flavor)? Or that I use peanut butter like mayo in all sandwiches?  Or that I dip my grilled cheese in ketchup?  I think it’s interesting how people eat common foods in different ways.  I just hate it when I eat something a different way or say I don’t like a certain food, and people go all drama queen on me.  “EEEEWWW!!! That’s like soooo GROSS!”  Just suck it up.  I don’t complain when you eat nasty things.  As long as you’re not waving it in my face or chewing with your mouth open so I can conduct a study on how saliva aids the digestion process by already starting to break down food once it hits your repulsive mouth, who cares??  It’s just a difference of taste buds.


I laugh to myself when I hear people say they’re afraid of the dark.  Darkness isn’t scary.  People are afraid of what darkness conceals.  The unknown.  When I was little, I was afraid of the dark.  I was afraid to go into the basement when the lights weren’t on.  Now I know that I had an overactive imagination and probably watched too many murder/mystery tv shows.  I was afraid that someone had snuck in through a basement window and was just waiting for me to come down the stairs so he could grab me and threaten my life to make my family do what he wanted.  I also thought there were two alligators that lived under the stairs and once I turned off the lights and took the first step to go upstairs, they’d somehow appear at the bottom of the stairs.  I had to race up the stairs as fast as I could and close the door because they were right behind me, with their mouths open, ready to snap off my heels.  I never looked back to “see them” so don’t worry; I wasn’t a hallucinating child.


Hmmm... I liked writing this.  I think this will be something like a series of posts.  I’ll post a “thoughts” post whenever I organize some of my old notes or when I come up with new ones.